Anne Rice Admits to Writing Jesus Fan Fiction

Long-time opponent of fanfiction and author of at least two readable books, Anne Rice has reluctantly changed her tune about the genre she so strongly dislikes. “I am a Jesus fanfic writer,” she admitted in a recent restatement of the headline.

Critics maintain that Ms. Rice began her career writing Anaïs Nin imitations and has, since The Vampire Lestat, written several books of Anne Rice fanfiction.

Upon her reentry to faith in the Catholic Church, she turned her attentions to the great Nazarene Protagonist himself. Christ the Lord: Out of Egypt is a fictional account of Jesus’ formative years. Its sequel is The Road to Cana, which presents the beginning of his earthly ministry. Hope, Crosby and Lamour are noticeably absent.

Asked why she opposed material derived from her own work, but felt no compunction borrowing Jesus, she commented, “I don’t want people reworking my imagination. I invented bisexual vampirism, after all. And creepy children. I invented them too. As for Jesus, I just filled in the blanks.”

A spokesman for Pope Benedict issued a statement that the Holy Father had not read the work, but has sent it on to Vatican lawyers. “We trust,” he said, “that it is better than The Tale of the Body Thief.”