Dragonball Live-Action Movie Trailer

If you run in nerd circles, you’ve inevitably come up against the nerdier-than-thou types who ruin any casual enjoyment of a series (some times even whole genres) with their preaching. (If you’re a good nerd, you ought to have been that sort of mechanerd once or twice yourself.) Most of the time, it’s fine to just nod and shake your head at appropriate moments. Eventually, however, someone is going to catch you out at your pretense of being in-the-know. I find that it’s just better to state your ignorance upfront and admit that you’re proceeding from a standpoint of being only semi-informed.

So, with that in mind, I am ready to present to you the brand new Dragonball live-action movie trailer. (Full title: Dragonball Evolution. Because they’ve evolved into real people, but you’d never know it from some of the acting choices.) I caught a few episodes of Dragonball Z on Cartoon Network. I checked in on a Monday and there Was! A! Fight! About! To! Happen! Lives! Were! At! Stake! By Friday, no one had even set foot in the ring. I guess that means that the live-action movie can only improve on the anime’s pacing, but I’m sure “real” anime nerds will crucify me for even suggesting it.

That said, this looks like a fabulously bad movie:

Chow Yun-Fat does a mystical exposition dump! He doesn’t even giggle when he says “dragonballs,” which ought to earn him a medal or something. He does say it as fast as he possibly can, though. “Okay, ha-ha, BALLS, people. Moving on...”

Offended fans line up to the right. Offended people with taste to the left.