Thu
Apr 1 2010 2:22pm

Entmoot Convenes to Discuss Same-Sex Marriage

Ents traditionally hold that some day the long-absent Entwives will return. Many Ents, consequently, frown on Ent-Ent cohabitation. But change seems to be coming, even to the change-resistant Ents. An Entmoot has been called in Fanghorn Forest to discuss the matter. Quickbeam, like many younger Ents, feels the change is long overdue. “This isn’t really about the Entwives returning or not. It’s about love.” Treebeard disagrees, saying the Entings are hasty and considers Quickbeam “bendy.”

In related news, the fighting Uruk-hai are rumored to have considered lifting the “Keep it Secret. Keep it Safe” policy.

11 comments
Jaymee Goh
1. Jha
Love this so hard. Love love love.

*is all cheerful now*
Cory Skerry
2. pussinboots
Regarding the last line, I can't believe anything would ever willingly have sex with an orc--even another orc--if they weren't going to get something else out of it, like a tender, tasty baby.
Gabriele Campbell
3. G-Campbell
Lol, pussinboots, you should check LOTR slash fanficts. There's NOTHING that doesn't get slashed, including Orcs (with each other and with Fellowship characters), Treebeard and Bill the Pony, and there's even a Gollum/Jar Jar Binks crossover.

And I should not know that. ;)
Pablo Defendini
4. pablodefendini
O.o

Gollum/Jar Jar Binks slashfic?

I'm now scarred for life.
Cory Skerry
5. pussinboots
@G-Campbell, I'm well-aware of Rule 34. (Thanks for reminding my poor, queasy stomach.)

But I was referring to real orcs, not people fantasies. People want to see dragon-winged wolficorns in bondage, but I've never seen real dragon-winged wolficorns do anything but eat roadkill and sniff each other's butts.
Marcus Cockerham
6. Aquila
@5 pussinboots:

I've never seen real dragon-winged wolficorns... or real dragons, unicorns, or winged wolves, for that matter.
:-)

And I really could have gone the rest of my life without hearing about Gollum/Jar Jar. Now where did I put that brain bleach...
jon meltzer
7. jmeltzer
I fear that Entmoot will be finished before Don't Ask, Don't Tell is repealed ...
Gabriele Campbell
8. G-Campbell
Well, real Orcs are mammals, right? So I suppose they have sex. They may even find each other attractive. ;)
Gabriele Campbell
10. G-Campbell
Yeah, he does. 'Saruman crossed Orcs with goblin men' would be one - in Tolkien's time that would have meant producing baby uruks the normal way, no genetic cloning and in vitro fertilization. I also think the torture of Elrond's wife may have included being raped by Orcs. It's not something Tolkien would have said outright.
travesti
13. travesti
as gay or homosexual patients who would denounce. homosexual disease is gay or not. transphobia actual disease.thnk you for sharing travesti

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