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Featured Essays Suvudu Cage Match

Lev Grossman Writes Short Self-Parody for Suvudu’s Cage Match

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Published on March 12, 2012

Suvudu Cage Match 2012
Suvudu Cage Match 2012

Suvudu’s Cage Match is starting up its second round today, and one of the bouts features Peter Grant from Ben Aaronovitch’s Moon Over Soho versus Julia Wicker from Lev Grossman’s The Magicians. For the occasion, Lev has written up a short piece, parodying his own prose style. Here’s a snippet:

“Julia Wicker,” she said, using her maximally royal tone. “I do not know how you came here, but if you leave now I will not stop you. We do not have to do this.”

God dammit, Julia thought, why did she have to talk like that all the time? Along with everything else, she had completely lost the hang of contractions.

“Actually, we do have to,” the guy said, not unkindly, even a little regretfully. English bloke by his accent. “I checked the tags on this post. It’s one of those Cage Match ones.”

Right. This guy was going to try to kill her, she thought. Ready player one.

Read the rest and vote in Suvudu’s Cage Match here!

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