With Harrison Ford officially occupied with Star Wars for the foreseeable future, it would seem that Disney has gotten impatient with the status of Indiana Jones and thrown around the “R” word—reboot.
But it’s this Robert Pattinson casting rumor that has our attention.
According to an unnamed “insider,” Pattinson is the forerunner for the fedora-d lead, currently:
“Disney is looking at its long-term options for the Indiana Jones franchise. They feel that the series has huge potential on many levels, starting with the films leading to other spin-offs like games which can generate more money than movies. Rob is top of the initial list because he has showed his acting stripes away from Twilight. But the competition will be stiff.”
Okay, we agree that Pattinson has untapped potential that the Twilight films did not offer him. And he’s a good actor when given half-decent material. (He also made you cry as Cedric Diggory.) It also makes sense that the studio is thinking younger, probably hoping that the next actor will stick with the part for many years and many blockbusters to come.
But… well, there are so many options. And we can’t imagine that most actors wouldn’t jump at the chance to play the part. So here are a few of our picks:
Get that Bane mask off the poor guy and hand him a role that showcases his lighter side! Hardy is always forced to play the straight man (or growling villain) in most film he appears in. This would be a welcome change. And Marion could be Naomie Harris! Get her out from behind M’s desk and back into field work—she would lay down the law for him in no time flat, and we want to watch her drink people under tables.
Because OF COURSE. He would be so much fun in the part, and it would give him a chance to really flex his muscles after the sweetness that was Community’s Troy. Plus, then you could get Idris Elba to play his dad! (We’re going on the assumption that Elba will be the next Bond, and that Jones Sr. must always be a former Bond. It works out perfectly.)
You have got to give this guy something he can use to taunt elder brother Chris with. “Oh, you’re the god of thunder? Well I’m one of the most beloved antiheroes of the 20th century!” He looks better scruffy and has mastered sardonic facial expressions. Easy pick. And instead of Indy’s best buddy Wu Han dying at the beginning of a Temple of Doom rework, this time the character is played by Rinko Kikuchi, and she survives, and they go on an epic temple raid!
We sort of (and by “sort of” we mean “head over heels”) fell in love with Mackie as Falcon in Captain America: The Winter Soldier. Mackie is warm, bright, funny and clearly well-disposed toward the action genre. You know he’d look great in the hat. Let’s do this. And to accompany him, we’ll have Natalie Dormer as Elsa—when she turns out to be a traitor there will be so many evil little smirks.
We’d also accept Lucy Lawless or Jamie Alexander or Charlize Theron or Michelle Rodriguez, but—have you guys seen Haywire? Do you know what this woman can do? She’d rock that leather jacket, and her petulant smirk would stop Nazis in their tracks. And her Sallah could be Indira Varma! They would be so. amazing.
Who are your picks?