Well, you can’t really keep at a sprint forever, right? This week’s episode of True Blood was pretty damn boring, truth be told. At least until the last ten minutes. It’s not that the hour was without some highlights (that ending!), but it overall felt like a ton of set-up. Sookie asks some important questions, La-la unlocks his potential, and bad witch Antonia finds a new BFF.
So long, hot security chick. We hardly knew thee and when we did, we thought you were Evan Rachel Wood in disguise. Or at least I did. Antonia makes the vampire Louis her bitch to announce her rebirth. Can’t say she didn’t give the vampires fair warning about her walking-on-sunshine spell. The popular vampires will at least get a heads-up from Bill to sleep in silver to prevent immolation. But ugly, lonely vamps like Maxine’s neighbor are SOL, I guess. I wonder if anyone would’ve warned poor old Eddie, were he alive.
While the vampires and witches go at it, the wolf pack of Shreveport grew by two. I’m buying Debbie’s attempts at redemption much more than Tommy’s. This new pack looks potentially dangerous, but certainly leagues above Cooter. Debbie seems so happy to be a part of a pack again. But Alcide’s continued attraction to Sookie is definitely widening the gulf between them. I don’t know what was sadder, the look on Alcide’s face when he saw her with Eric or the look on Debbie’s when she saw her boyfriend’s mixed emotions. Debbie may or may not become unhinged because of this, but either way, I can’t see her and Alcide being together much longer.
Sookie and Eric spent half this episode having sex. Literally. How did they make it back to Sookie’s house like that? I’m going with vampire powers. When they disentangled themselves long enough to breathe, Sookie wonders what will happen when Eric gets his memory back. Eric says that he never wants it back if it means Sookie might stop loving him. I miss smarmy Eric a bit, but damn if Alexander Skarsgard’s wide-eyed innocent act isn’t insanely cute. I’m starting to wonder if Antonia’s going to live long enough to reverse the spell on Eric.
And Pam. Poor, poor Pam.
Okay, Pam’s a bitch. She’s also needlessly racist in her insults this season. But all of the other vampires get someone they love to put them in silver for the night. Bill and his child Jessica, Eric and Sookie. Pam gets Ginger. And six injections of anti-rot serum four times a day. I love Ginger though. The way she rode Pam’s coffin, you can bet everyone’s favorite barfly spent some serious time on a mechanical bull.
Tommy’s jaunt as a skinwalking rapist was revealed. Luna didn’t look nearly disgusted enough, in my opinion. But do we really think Tommy’s going out with such a whimper?
Down in Mexico, Grandpa Brujo utters the words no one wants to hear their grandpa say: “What? I was fucking my wife.” Uncomfortable. Anyway, Jesus is safe from his family’s black magic, for now at least. Or maybe his family isn’t all bad. Uncle Luca sounded like a good brujo. But either way, La-la now sees dead people. Like Arlene’s baby’s ghost.
Tara joins forces with Antonia because they are both fueled by hate for vampires. Tara’s always some greater evil’s flunky, right? She just kind of clings to whatever comes along. This character has so run her course for me. I can’t find anything to like about her anymore. It’s sad. So much wasted badass-dom and Angela Bassett arms.
The ending was really the most exciting part of the show. I was surprised that Antonia performed her spell so soon. But I’m glad they didn’t drag it out. I loved watching Jessica fight her chains and claw her way towards the front door as Jason raced to save her. Go gallant Jason! Vampires in chains = compelling. Jason in chains = a shame. Will the vampires be sleeping in silver every day until Antonia’s wiped out?
So… yeah. That was pretty much it this episode. I liked the different couples talking about themselves. Everyone’s in some kind of love-related turmoil. I’d like to say Hoyt and Jessica will go the distance, but Jessica admitted that she wasn’t in love with Hoyt anymore. That’s awful. I’ve become more invested in Hoyt and Jessica as a couple than any of the other couple on the show. They’re just so likeable. So real on a show of sexy fantasy. But that realness works both ways; given what Jessica’s going through, how she’s maturing, it’s all the more heartbreaking to see their relationship in such plausable jeopardy.
True Blood airs Sundays at 9PM E/PT on HBO.
Theresa DeLucci has been reviewing television on Tor.com for three years. Her coverage includes Battlestar Galactica, Heroes, Lost, Dexter and, most recently, Game of Thrones.