So apparently there was a new episode on Sunday. Don’t trust TV Guide listings. So this felt like bonus True Blood to me! There were reunions and breakups and breakups mid-union. And there was lots of sexual tension, not all of it welcome. Debbie and Eric made different opening moves on their quests for vengeance. And Arlene hired Jack Nicholson in drag over at Merlotte’s.
Spoilers after the cut.
Sookie and Bill had the shortest-lived breakup in TV history.
Of course the whole on-again/off-again routine is part of what makes the show’s drama quotient so high, but I really thought they were done after that teary goodbye. Bill and Sookie both made very compelling arguments for why they love each other but could never work as a couple. On a good day, even if your vampire intended wasn’t wanted by the King of Mississippi (and Louisiana!) for treason, there’s still all those other ethical and logical problems to think about. Sookie handled the whole thing maturely, realistically, reverting back to her pre-Bill self as a comfort. I had forgotten how much Sookie liked to sunbathe. I don’t know how much input Alan Ball has on individual scripts, but Sookie and Tara sharing a moment on the lawn seemed like a touching reaction to loss that Ball handled so beautifully in Six Feet Under. I was completely convinced this breakup would stick. For a few episodes at least.
Let’s focus on good, sexy vibes: the hug Alcide gave Sookie was hotter than a hug had any right to be. All of the could’ve-been was contained in that embrace. I feel like Sookie from the first season would’ve slept with Alcide by now as a rebound. Maybe she’s grown. But clearly not enough to realize that werewolves have lifestyles much more conducive to relationships with sun-tanning humans. Dog-men are superior to vampires in almost every way. Alcide better not stray far.
With were-bitch Debbie still not dead yet, I’m sure he won’t. That was most definitely the girlfight I was hoping for. Down and dirty, hair-pulling, face-cutting, scratching. Sookie is way too nice—I would’ve shot Debbie as soon as she kicked in my door. I wonder if Debbie can ever be redeemed. I think she’s too far gone and hurt Alcide too much for him to let her live. Maybe. Alcide is such a sad sack, I bet he’s still holding out for the girl he fell in love with to reappear.
Reappearing as predicted, Franklin is now starring in Tara’s unbidden sex dreams. She can’t catch a break. But, damn, I’m still liking her now that she doesn’t want to die. When she kills Franklin (you know justice is coming) and the hold he has over her is gone, I hope Tara will be rewarded with a happy relationship. Kind of like the one Lafayette is building with Jesus. I’m glad they’ve kissed and made up. But I’m wondering when the vampires and witches will come for Merlotte’s favorite cook?
I’m guessing sooner than Lafayette’s mama foretold because I believe Arlene just hired a witch. Stupid Arlene. Holly has waitressed on Seinfeld and been a stripper on Arrested Development, so she’s got experience with serving food and nudity. That seems to be the job skills for Merlotte’s. Holly’s also got a seriously terrifying set of eyebrows. Combined with the high forehead, she reminds me of a demon out of an Aphex Twin video. No good can come of this.
Lastly, there was Eric. Eric is a terrible faker. I can buy that Russell is so self-important he would just eat up Eric’s praise, to a point. But Eric is so obviously not trustworthy. I love homoerotic male vampires as much as the next girl, but I thought Eric could fake a little more passion for Talbot. Talbot is the true Vampire Queen of Mississippi; no wonder Sophie-Ann was put in Russell’s closet.
Rest in piece Talbot.
So what will happen when Russell finds out that Eric killed his spouse? Is it easier to take Russell down now that most of his werewolves are dead?
Things I liked:
- Bill starts acting like a maker at last and gives Jessica fighting pointers. Basically every scene with Jessica was a win this week.
- Talbot: “I’m bored. Take off your clothes.”
- Alcide snarling after Sookie’s scream woke him up.
- The hint of badness to come when we see Sam learn that Tommy may not play so well with others. Finally, this storyline may pick up!
Things I liked less:
- The people behind True Blood thinking anyone could entertain the thought of Jason actually killing Bill this week. Or ever. There’s no suspense there and no amount of Rambo-esque locking and loading montages will create it.
- Jason is still boring. Discuss.
Theresa DeLucci is a graduate of the 2008 Clarion West Writers’ Worshop. her short fiction has appeared in Chizine, Morbid Outlook, and Tear magazine.