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Several weeks ago‚ Lucasfilm announced to the world that there was a new Star Wars television show for children in development. Its unfortunate title? “Squishies.”

This week, Lucasfilm announced to the world that there was a new Star Wars television sitcom in development with the creators of “Robot Chicken.”

Today, I am announcing to the world that George Lucas has lost his mind.

Let’s start with “Squishies“:

Here’s the thing: I was introduced to Star Wars when I was five. I did not need Jar Jar Binks or Battle Droids running around making fools of themselves while saying “Roger, Roger” to get me invested in the story. I had R2-D2 and C-3PO in a desert. That was awesome. I loved Yoda (so much so that I was Yoda for Halloween when I was 8) and yeah, to a five-year-old Jordan, the Ewoks were pretty sweet. But the fact is, what I loved about Star Wars went beyond my complete Bend-Ems action figure set and 12-inch models of the main characters. It was the story.

I worry that the children of the future will be introduced to Star Wars not through the original three films, but through a television series that IS BASED ON A LINE OF TOYS.

Look, I know that Lucas might shock me and create something genius with this series. I know Clone Wars has its fans. But something tells me his version of Lil’ Star Wars is not going to be nearly as good as The Muppet Babies Star Wars.

I feel like the show will simply exist to sell pre-existing toys. That just makes me sad.

Now onto the Star Wars sitcom:

This does not bother me as much on a fan level. Who doesn’t love Robot Chicken’s Star Wars parodies? My issue with this is that Lucas has clearly decided to openly announce that he is willing to shill out his franchise for anything that will make a buck. But that is not anything new. I actually think the series itself might be funny, but it feels weird to have Lucas-sanctioned Star Wars humor. Hopefully those Robot Chicken guys will only have one fart joke per episode… but I doubt that.

There is also a rumor floating that these two announcements are actually the same show. Now THAT would be wacky.

Well, Star Wars fans. How do you feel?


Jordan Hamessley is a children’s book editor at Penguin Books for Young Readers where she edits the Batman: The Brave and the Bold and Chaotic publishing programs, as well as developing original series. She is also an assistant editor for Lightspeed Magazine. She can be found on twitter as @thejordache. She is still sad that Mark Hamill was not at her 8th birthday party.

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Jordan Hamessley

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Nerd children's book editor with a love of all things sci-fi.
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