John Anealio Writes Songs For Our Kind of People

It’s hard not to fall for an artist who writes a song called, “George R.R. Martin Is Not Your Bitch.” John Anealio wrote the song after Neil Gaiman’s now-famous response to someone who asked what a writer owes his or her readers.

If you think the books are entertaining
It’s best you stop complaining
Writers just aren’t machines

George Martin never signed a contract

To just work on that project
So find something else to read

Have you tried Fevre Dream?

George RR Martin is not your bitch
No matter how much you gripe
George RR Martin is not your bitch
So you might as well go get a life

After listening to “George R.R. Martin Is Not Your Bitch,” I immediately subscribed to the podcast. Sci Fi Songs is where Anealio posts both his songs and the DVD-like commentary describing his creative process. The most recent commentary covers his song “Cylon #6” where he details his watching of the entirety of Battlestar Galactica and the inspiration to cover Number Six, both from a geek angle and a musical angle. As a geek I could relate; as a non-musical person I was fascinated by his approach.

Anealio released a CD of his best songs of last year, also titled Sci Fi Songs, which I recently got my hands on. It doesn’t have the GRRM song (which is a non-issue; you can download it for free online.) but it has several awesome songs geekier than me.

Anealio will write about any SF topic that strikes him. This includes humorous ones like the above GRRM song and “Batman’s Rebuttal…”

The Martian ManHunter said they should search for them
Don’t they know that song is just a joke
The Flash found them hanging out at a hotel bar
They were drunk on whiskey and diet coke

The Green Lantern comes and aims his power ring
creates a Green Guitar and then begins to sing

But I don’t think that Batman smells
When he rings his bat jingle bells
and I don’t think that Robin laid an egg

Yeah I don’t think that Batman smells
if he did, how could you tell?
I just know that the Joker got away

… To the thoughtful or serious topics such as “Lonesome October Night,” a tribute to Roger Zelazny’s “A Night in the Lonesome October.”

Jack the Ripper and his old dog Snuff
prepared themselves with a wand and knife
Everything will be changed by the end of The Game
on this Lonesome October Nigh


Crazy Jill went to the top of the hill
Gray the cat was by her side
they had to open the gate before it’s too late
on this Lonesome October Night

I will admit that I don’t get all of the references in Anealio’s eclectic mix, but I enjoyed nearly all of the songs on the album, whether they were serious or wacky. “Angels and Vampires“, a Memnoch the Devil homage, is a good one, as is “The Millennium Falcon for Christmas“. The album is recommended, and if you’re not sure, check out his podcast to get a sense of his considerable style and talent.

Mur Lafferty is an author and podcaster. She is the host and producer of the Story Podcast and I Should Be Writing and the author of Playing For Keeps, among other things. You can find all of her projects at


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