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posted Friday February 06, 2009 01:59pm EST

Tor.com Name-that-Zombie Caption Contest

John Joseph Adams

We here at Tor.com love us some zombies, and judging from your comments and our webstats, a lot of you love zombies, too. And so it is with great pleasure that we announce the inevitable Tor.com Name-that-Zombie Caption Contest.

How do you play? It’s easy. All you have to do is come up with your best caption (50 words or less) for the zombie photo above, and post it as a comment in reply to this post. Our panel of judges will evaluate all of the entries, and our favorite one will be chosen as the winner.

The winner will receive a superfabulous zombie prize pack, containing:

The undeadline is one week from today, February 13, Midnight (EST).

NO PURCHASE NECESSARY.  A PURCHASE DOES NOT INCREASE YOUR CHANCES OF WINNING.  To participate in the “Zombie Caption” contest,  leave a comment including a caption for the posted image in the comments section below, beginning Friday, 06 February, 2009 and ending on Friday, 13 February, 2009. Winners will be selected on the basis of originality, humor and creativity, each factor applied equally.  Open to  registered users of Tor.com who are legal U.S. residents 18 years of age and older.  Void in Puerto Rico and where prohibited by law. For complete Official Rules, go here.  Sponsor:  Tor.com, a division of Macmillan, 175 5th Avenue, New York, NY 10010.

Updated: And we have a winner! Full details available here.

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categories: ...and Related Subjects
tags: zombies, anthologies, contests, Left 4 Dead, The Living Dead

60 comments
Eric Carlson
1.  Tennerock
VIEW ALL BY · Friday February 06, 2009 02:42pm EST
The line between work and play was a bit blurry for the detectives of the latest CSI franchise...
Ken Neth
2.  neth
VIEW ALL BY · Friday February 06, 2009 02:51pm EST
The source of all those reprogrammed road signs is identified. Zombie cops threaten to unionize.
John Cater
3.  katre
VIEW ALL BY · Friday February 06, 2009 02:56pm EST
The King and Queen of the Zombie Prom.
Wasaty
4.  Wasaty
Friday February 06, 2009 02:59pm EST
To serve. You.
Wasaty
5.  rc6750
Friday February 06, 2009 03:10pm EST
Falling Off The Thin Blue Line: A Badge, a Shuffle, and a Struggle with Brain Addiction.
james loyd
6.  gaijin
VIEW ALL BY · Friday February 06, 2009 03:14pm EST
"Braaaains...I mean dooooonuts...um, braaaains? Oh, I'm so confused."
Wasaty
7.  JohnGWill
Friday February 06, 2009 04:07pm EST
Do you, Rigga, Take you, Mortis, to have and to hold, until you both just fall apart?
Ryan Gustafson
8.  robotrevolution
VIEW ALL BY · Friday February 06, 2009 04:53pm EST
"You're out of line, Smith!" the Captain shouted. "One more suspect turns up missing their brain and you're FIRED!"

"Uuurrrrhhhhh..."

"And none of that back-talk or I'll demote you down to traffic. You're a loose cannon, Smith - you and your partner! Now get out of my sight!"
Wasaty
9.  Angela Hale
Friday February 06, 2009 04:58pm EST
We Loved the Inauguration! We got jobs jobs jobs and brains brains brains because we were the only police left locally!
Tim McDonald
10.  MrTimmy
VIEW ALL BY · Friday February 06, 2009 06:04pm EST
Mae said, "Why Officer McStiffy, is that your gun, or are you just glad to see me?"
Doug Browne
11.  dejaffa
VIEW ALL BY · Friday February 06, 2009 06:31pm EST
Officer Friendly would like a word with you.
Ben HM3
12.  BenHM3
VIEW ALL BY · Friday February 06, 2009 06:55pm EST
The sad thing about the Department's new "open door" policy for minorities is that the new recruits had to partner with each other.
Wasaty
13.  Lou Wysocki
Friday February 06, 2009 07:04pm EST
"Let's be careful out there."
Wasaty
14.  bookmomC
Friday February 06, 2009 07:47pm EST
Mike and Julie have been third shift security guards for five years now and its really starting to show.
Wasaty
15.  eldritch00
Friday February 06, 2009 09:17pm EST
Martin Scorsese remade Infernal Affairs as The Departed. Now, George Romero remakes The Departed as The Dearly Departed.
Hope Hosley
- -
17.  heresiarch
VIEW ALL BY · Friday February 06, 2009 11:03pm EST
It's kind of ironic how the zombie apocalypse happened during our flash mob.
Wasaty
18.  Matt C. Wilson
Saturday February 07, 2009 08:43pm EST
In the Undead Justice System humans are persecuted by two separate, yet equally important groups. The fast zombies who pursue the living and the zombie mobs who consume their brains. These are their stories.
John Glover
19.  jtglover
VIEW ALL BY · Sunday February 08, 2009 10:18am EST
All this, and BRAAAAIIIINNNS too.
Wasaty
20.  rightcoast
Sunday February 08, 2009 03:44pm EST
In response to increased scrutiny after Thursday's report showing that police brutality was up 17,000% over last month's already historic highs, union rep Lisa Fulchi and police spokesperson Matt Brooks held a press conference this morning. They assure the public they, "ZzzzUUuUZzzzt AAAaahHT ZZzzZrrAAaNNS."
Wasaty
21.  rightcoast
Sunday February 08, 2009 03:46pm EST
Darn. Misspelled Fulci and didn't catch it in the preview. :(
Wasaty
22.  C.Cevasco
Sunday February 08, 2009 07:33pm EST
"You have the right to remain Soylent..."
Wasaty
23.  Donna S
Sunday February 08, 2009 10:20pm EST
Have you had dinner yet? Please join us.
Wasaty
24.  Victorya
Monday February 09, 2009 09:06am EST
New From Dick Wolf: Law and Order: Undead Division
Wasaty
25.  Jacob P. Silvia
Monday February 09, 2009 10:18am EST
Do you smell bacon? ... Really, really rancid bacon?
Wasaty
26.  Aaron Polson
Monday February 09, 2009 11:54am EST
You have the right to be eaten. Anything you say will likely be ignored because we are dead. You have the right to scream, moan, or groan during consumption. If you are rendered unable to utter a sound, one of us will moan for you. Do you understand these rights?
Wasaty
27.  Mark Matthews
Monday February 09, 2009 01:21pm EST
Metro Parking Enforcement: Zombie Division. "The fines are stiff and so are our officers"
Wasaty
28.  Josh A Smith
Monday February 09, 2009 04:15pm EST
And then things got a LITTLE out of control at the 35th annual police officers bash. Should have known better than to offer a open brains bar!
Wasaty
29.  nihawkins
Monday February 09, 2009 06:06pm EST
At a recent Cop Rock reunion, two former cast members express through costume the state of their careers since the show's cancellation.
Wasaty
30.  David Boop
Tuesday February 10, 2009 12:18pm EST
Under the new regime, Homeland Security has added extra TSA Officers to expedite the screening process of people with laptops, baby strollers, and bling.
Scott Kennedy
31.  scottken
VIEW ALL BY · Tuesday February 10, 2009 12:21pm EST · amended on Tuesday February 10, 2009 12:22pm EST
Fan Guests of Honor "Mrrrrm" and "Nyarrgh" at Cop Con 30 in Monroeville, PA.
Wasaty
32.  Larry Hodges
Tuesday February 10, 2009 12:24pm EST
It wasn't until their faces turned blue and their flesh began rotting away that the passengers and crew of Flight 1549 realized that none of them had survived the crash into the Hudson River.
C S Inman
33.  csinman
VIEW ALL BY · Tuesday February 10, 2009 12:43pm EST
Well, this is the first time I've been pulled over for having encephalitis, and I guess it'll be my last.
Wasaty
34.  katiebabs
Tuesday February 10, 2009 02:45pm EST
We want happy hour... now!
Leah Hurst
35.  kaplooeymom
VIEW ALL BY · Tuesday February 10, 2009 03:18pm EST
In the current economy, even zombies must work past retirement.
Wasaty
36.  Captplothole
Tuesday February 10, 2009 03:39pm EST
Some critics suggested the Cagney and Lacey reunion came about ten years too late.
Wasaty
37.  bliteratewench
Tuesday February 10, 2009 11:22pm EST
They were zombies and cops, and they thought they'd seen it all, but what they saw through the window that night revolted even their decaying sensibilities.
Jason Thummel
38.  JasonT
VIEW ALL BY · Wednesday February 11, 2009 07:50am EST
When the strippers showed up at Bob's bachelor party, he knew his request for something "unique" had been misinterpreted.
Wasaty
39.  Baelyn Al'Rosh
Wednesday February 11, 2009 11:41am EST
"I'm sorry oficer, but I'm not taking a speeding ticket until I see your badge. That red faux-hawk can't be regulation. And while you're at it could you have your partner quit gnawing on my arm?"
Christopher K
40.  Cadfael
VIEW ALL BY · Wednesday February 11, 2009 01:53pm EST
I'm sorry officers, you must be mistaken. There's no Brian here, let alone more than one.
Kell Brown
41.  KellBrown
VIEW ALL BY · Wednesday February 11, 2009 03:02pm EST · amended on Wednesday February 11, 2009 03:02pm EST
"We're here for the Max Brooks signing. We're huge fans. Huge."
Kell Brown
42.  KellBrown
VIEW ALL BY · Wednesday February 11, 2009 03:03pm EST
"Yes, we are short fiction editors. How'd you know?"
Aliya Barnwell
43.  MaryJBurnswell
VIEW ALL BY · Wednesday February 11, 2009 06:08pm EST
Unfortunately, Mayor Bloomberg's experiments with alternative labor sources resulted in less stringent badge requirements. Coincidentally, in a story the mayor's office claims is unrelated, the number of human bite cases at citywide hospitals has increased exponentially.
Wasaty
44.  Perry P. Perkins
Wednesday February 11, 2009 10:07pm EST
What REALLY happened to Heather Locklear and Adrian Zmed...
Wasaty
45.  Ben Alvarez
Thursday February 12, 2009 12:43am EST
[sung to the tune of Cops]
Dead boys. Dead boys.
Watcha gonna do?
Watcha gonna do when the dead pursue you?
Dead boys. Dead boys.
Watcha gonna do?
Apocolypse is here and the cops eat you ...
Wasaty
46.  Emz0r
Thursday February 12, 2009 02:49pm EST
"In the criminal justice system, the people are represented by two separate yet equally important groups: the police, who eat your brains, and the dist - hey, wait a sec, that's not the aaaAAAGH HELP HELP AAAUUUUGGGH-" [dun-dun...]
Wasaty
47.  Emz0r
Thursday February 12, 2009 02:57pm EST
"Tobias Funke was happy to see the Hot Cops until he realized they were cold. Cold, and oddly inarticulate. And hungry."
Wasaty
48.  Tori Schwanberg-Wright
Thursday February 12, 2009 06:54pm EST
At eHarmony, our patented Compatibility Matching System® narrows the field from millions of candidates to a highly select group of singles that are compatible with you. Unlike other sites where you can post a picture and paragraph and then browse the profiles of other users, eHarmony does the matching for you based on 29 DimensionsTM of personality that are scientifically-based predictors of long-term relationship success, including sense of humor, movies, religion, and eating brains.
Daniel Brown
49.  dannyb741
VIEW ALL BY · Thursday February 12, 2009 09:37pm EST
With a sense of creeping terror, their last few synapses flaring briefly, Archie and Mabel realized what had befallen them. They were... Oh-God, the horror... they were... police officers!
Delilah Peeler
50.  Delilah
VIEW ALL BY · Thursday February 12, 2009 09:52pm EST
Bad news. The brains in the evidence room are missing.
Delilah Peeler
51.  Delilah
VIEW ALL BY · Thursday February 12, 2009 09:53pm EST
You can cooperate and hand over your brain now, or we can haul your butt downtown and just take your plump, juicy brain.
Delilah Peeler
Delilah Peeler
53.  Delilah
VIEW ALL BY · Thursday February 12, 2009 09:56pm EST
Brains, it's what's for dinner. And breakfast. And lunch. And... get over here, meatbag!
Delilah Peeler
54.  Delilah
VIEW ALL BY · Thursday February 12, 2009 09:59pm EST
We're not the smurfs you're looking for.
Wasaty
55.  J M McDermott
Friday February 13, 2009 01:54pm EST
"You have the right to remain dead. If you refuse that right..."
Richard Fife
56.  R.Fife
VIEW ALL BY · Friday February 13, 2009 02:36pm EST
What was the harm? The County Coronor could pay his subprime morgage with the Civil Servant Referal Bonus, and the zombies just seemed to enjoy it so darn much!
Steve Nagy
57.  SteveNagy
VIEW ALL BY · Friday February 13, 2009 11:14pm EST
George Romero presents Nightsticks of the Living Dead.
Wasaty
58.  Mr Boomstik
Saturday February 14, 2009 09:39am EST
We got our tickets for Marley & Me from fandango dot com.
Wasaty
59.  SkatteredKat
Wednesday February 18, 2009 08:30am EST
Sid and Nancy Vicious, the later years, promoting Sid's new album "So punk IS dead... f*** it!"
Wasaty
60.  boredstiff
Thursday April 30, 2009 03:08pm EDT
That's right we ate the author after he called us the Living Dead. The proper term is the Undead. Got it?
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