Nov 16 2011 9:00am

Morning Roundup: Panic! Kristen Stewart Has Been Cast in Akira

Welcome to Wednesday. Your mission, should you decide to accept, it will be to find a way to become cooler than Stubby the Rocket. If you fail in becoming cooler than Stubby the Rocket, the internet will disavow any knowledge of your coolness. This blog will self-destruct after you have read all the fun offsite links. Highlights include:

1.) Brass bugs.

2.) Shapeshifting Fringe dust-up.

3.) A Cthulhu hidden on the internet!

From our handy “Of Interest” sidebar:

Stubby the Rocket is the voice and mascot of Stubby the Rocket is still cooler than everyone, if only because Stubby is a rocket and you are not.

1. mordicai
I'm fine with Kristen Stewart. I'm not fine with a white-washed, race-bent version of Akira.
Chin Bawambi
2. bawambi
Actually the only way I'd be fine with the actors chosen so far is if as someone suggested sarcastically on another site that Tetsuo becomes Timmy and Akiri becomes Kenny. This is beyond whitewashed now if you had any inclination to watch this please don't - it will be awful and will make your bottom five list if you do.
John Massey
3. subwoofer
Why would they need to Anglicize Akira? It's a Japanese movie, hence the title. Did folks not learn from "The Last Airbender"? And Kristen Stewart- poster child for Emo-nation? Gah.

I'm still flipping out about Star Trek 2 too:)

Joe Vondracek
4. joev
I never pictured Kei as a dead-eyed hooker, but whatever, I'm not gonna be watching some Hollywood-ized Fakira anyway.
John Massey
5. subwoofer
@joev- dead-eyed hooker- lol:D

yeah, that was a good image tordot picked of her.

aaron thompson
6. trench
This Akira is gonna make the American Dragonball movie look like The Godfather.
7. Gerry__Quinn
I'm fine with them remaking it any way they want to. And if the Japanese want to do remakes of Western films set in Tokyo using Japanese actors, that's cool with me too.
Presumably the owners of the Akira IP have no problems with it either.
Amber Poore
8. Razorgirl
*sigh* All I can say about the Akira "remake?" and the subsequent Kristen"vapid face/dead eye" Stewart casting is ... why... why... why... then sigh again and bang my forehead on my desk.
(not that re-setting and anglecizing = proper remake)
Amber Poore
9. Razorgirl
On a lighter note, the Mariana Trench infographic rocks! Ia!
John Massey
10. subwoofer
otoh, I saw the Wolverine anime series on Netflix the other day. I am not sure if the scale of the people is in effect but basically Logan has changed from the typical "runt" to tall and skinny like. And apparently he has super human strength, and no fighting skills beyond hack and slash. So Japan can pooch things too.

Go figure.

11. a1ay
I'm fine with them remaking it any way they want to. And if the
Japanese want to do remakes of Western films set in Tokyo using
Japanese actors, that's cool with me too.

Come to that, I'm pretty sure that Heimdallr, what with being a Norse god and everything, has a bit less melanin than Stringer Bell. But that's the magic of cinema!
12. a1ay
Also, turns out that "it is vital to ensure the mono-racial purity of Japanese cultural products!" still sounds creepy even now.
Chin Bawambi
13. bawambi
I have several problems with what I have heard about the production.

1) Akira is in essence both a morality play and a cultural tale. Any production that loses either of those factors is doomed from conception. See The Magnificent Seven or Ran for a successful translation from/to Anglo/Japanese culture.

2) The actors chosen for the major roles so far have not shown anywhere near the gravitas for the roles as originally conceived.

3) In isolation, one Hollywood instance of whitewashing would be lamentable but acceptable IF told properly. However, as many of us on this board are probably fans of Kung-Fu how much better would it have been with Bruce Lee as the lead rather than David Carradine - and that was a good production.

This will be terrible because the concept is flawed the poor casting will just make it that much worse. I can imagine several better Akira worlds both in the Anglo culture and not that have a better premise than Neo-Neo York. At least London is representative of England. As a native New Yorker my city is NOT similar to very much of the rest of country at all and doesn't have a large biker/gang culture or a big part of the MIC. Even Neo-LA would be better.

Subscribe to this thread

Receive notification by email when a new comment is added. You must be a registered user to subscribe to threads.
Post a comment