Apr 1 2009 11:30am

Fox Cancels Joss Whedon

Despite early indications to the contrary from network executives, FOX announced that Joss Whedon will be cancelled, most likely by marketing-assisted suicide.

This decision marks the end of a long and troubled relationship between the studio and the writer-director, beginning with FOX denying Whedon food and drink, leading up to a gradual reduction in his daily allowance of oxygen. 

“I am so not breathing,” Whedon confirmed. “This is me, all asphyxiating.”

Outraged fans claim that his career has been played out of order, and have created a “Save Joss” website, noting the success of the “Don’t Assassinate J.J. Abrams” campaign.

JS Bangs
1. jaspax
Eh, Whedon went downhill after his first two seasons anyway.
Stefan Hayden
2. STHayden
omg.. stop posting this. yes we get it. it's april fools. can't we get back to our lives? post some real news!
Harry Burger
3. Lightbringer
Then Captain Hammer stepped up to hog the spotlight and sing about how he was going to stop the executives, "'cause a man's gotta do, what a man's gotta do!"

At the same time, Malcolm Reynolds broke into Fox's headquarters while the security was distracted and stole the execs' bonus checks.

Unfortunately, Mal and Hammer saw each other and things just went down hill from there.
4. Nick235
In related news, Battlestar Galactica has been renewed for another four seasons. Producer Ronald D. Moore felt that the "this has all happened before and it will all happen again" theme needed to be put to the test. For more info visit
5. Nick236

Are you sure you don't mean

6. Nick236
@ self

Way to induce loathing... if only the 'SyFy' thing were actually an april fool's joke.... jees
Steven Padnick
7. padnick
"omg.. stop posting this. yes we get it. it's april fools. can't we get back to our lives? post some real news! "

... You seem to think that "regular operations on" = "real life".

You are mistaken.
8. Jennyvier
Great. Now I have to wait a bazillion years for them to release Joss Whedon on Blu-ray.
9. mskendrae
That is just mean about BSG!!!!
10. Buffyfest
The worst thing about it is this could totally be true and we'd never know it!! We'd be like "whatever, april fools! Dollhouse forever!!"

Wrong day to release any bad news
11. Jon Meltzer
The "suicide" is just a cover story. With the proper reprogramming Joss will be able to write any television show that the network desires.
12. wizzer
Never even got to do "Joss! The Musical."
13. Hunter Green
But will the unaired bits of Joss be on the DVD set?

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