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When one looks in the box, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the cat.

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Welcome back to The Pop Quiz at the End of the Universe, a recurring series here on Tor.com featuring some of our favorite science fiction and fantasy authors, artists, and others!

Today we’re joined by Kristen Simmons, who writes young adult fiction—the kind that’s dark and scary but generally involves some kissing. The third novel in her Article 5 series, Three, is available February 11th from Tor Teen. (You can read an excerpt here on Tor.com!) Kristen has a master’s degree in social work and is an advocate for mental health. She lives with her family and their precious greyhound Rudy in Tampa, Florida.

Join us as we cover subjects ranging from Sons of Anarchy to PB&J sandwiches, and more!

Name your favorite monster from fiction, film, TV, or any other pop culture source.

Walter White from Breaking Bad. That man went from good to evil fast. I so enjoyed his transformation and his general lack of shame regarding his own selfishness. I kind of envy it, actually.

Three Kristen Simmons Article 5Bad news: You’re about to be marooned alone on a desert island—name the five things you would bring along.

1. A Costco sized bin of almond roca. If I’m going out, I’m going out on a sugar rush.

2. My laptop. Which obviously plugs into the island’s power source.

3. A poster of a shirtless Jax Teller from Sons of Anarchy. (For obvious reasons.)

4. Michonne’s sword from The Walking Dead. For chopping coconuts. Or zombies.

5. Wilson the volleyball.

Two roads diverge in a yellow wood: one leads toward a mysterious laboratory in which a mad scientist is currently ensconced. The other winds its way toward a tower inhabited by a powerful wizard. You could really use a snack, and it would be nice to have somewhere to crash for the night—which road do you choose?

I feel like this is an obvious choice. The tower with the powerful wizard. He could magic me up a PB&J and have his orcs serve it up on a silver platter. You just can’t reason with a mad scientist.

What would your Patronus/familiar be?

Jax Teller with his shirt off.

If you were secretly going to write fanfic (or, even better, slashfic) about any two characters, who would they be?

Jax Teller and Kristen Simmons, author of the ARTICLE 5 series.

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