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When one looks in the box, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the cat.

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If you couldn’t tell from my Top 10 Best Werewolves in Movies & TV post, I appreciate the old school werewolves that rely primarily on makeup effects, costumes, and animatronics. I have very little patience for CGI effects, which is why you will see a lot of them on this list.

As hard as it was narrowing the best werewolves down to ten, the worst list was that much harder. There are a seemingly endless supply of terrible looking werewolves, many of which were suggested by the Tor.com Urban Fantasy Facebook and Twitter followers, and Hollywood keeps churning them out. If I could, I’d give honorable mentions to at least ten more that, while horrendous in their own right, weren’t quite bad enough to crack the top ten.

I do want to reitterate that this list is based soley on the overall werewolf effects and not the quality of the movie or TV show itself. The fact that several of these movies/shows happen to be forging new trails into the craptastic is purely coincidental.

 

10.) Van Helsing

Van Helsing werewolf

You need to see this guy in motion to really appreciate the awfulness here. The CGI makes it look like Thomas Kincaid painted werewolves.

 

9.) Thriller

Thriller werewolf

Love the video, love the song, love that it reteamed John Landis and Rick Baker (who worked together on An American Werewolf in London), but this look? Not loving it. So much is wrong here, but I think it’s the whiskers that really kill it for me.

 

8.) Cursed

Further proof that Rick Baker doesn’t always get it right. Although I put the blame more on the CGI overkill.

 

7.) Buffy: The Vampire Slayer

The first version of Oz as a werewolf made my top ten best looks, but after one episode, they switched to this so that Seth Green could play both parts. Bad. So bad. He looks like a bearded dog scampering around. And the female version? I have no words.

 

6.) Silver Bullet

Starring Gary Busey and Corey Haim was based on Cycle of the Werewolf by Stephen King (which King adapted himself). I hate including this one because it’s a personal favorite, but the werewolf looks like someone tried to recycle an old bear costume. According to IMDB, “producer Dino De Laurentiis was very unhappy with the werewolf used in the film. He was disappointed in both the way it looked and the way the costumed actor moved. This proved to be a bit of an insult to the actor wearing the suit as he was an accomplished modern dancer and was hired specifically for his movement skills.”

 

5.) Teen Wolf, Teen Wolf Too, and I Was A Teenage Werewolf

History has proven that any combination of the words “teen” and “wolf” in a movie are a mistake. Michael J. Fox and Jason Bateman both look like deformed wookies. Let’s hope the MTV reboot premiering in June has better effects. And poor Michael Landon’s movie actually had the tagline: “The most amazing motion picture of our time!”

 

4.) Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban

I maintain that this is not a werewolf, but rather some kind of diseased Rodent of Unusual Size

 

3.) Mexican Werewolf in Texas

Techically, this is suppossed to be a “Mexican werewolf Chupacabra,” but it looks like a cross between a dog with mange and Audrey II from Little Shop of Horrors.

 

2.) Werewolf

Thanks to Crowgirl for reminding me about this one. The MST3K guys perfectly describe the “wurwilf” effects: “Is that a bat? A bug? What is that?” When the big name star in a movie is Martin Sheen’s younger brother, Joe Estevez, you’ve got problems. On a side note, the attack scene in the puddle might be my favorite awesomely bad thing ever.

 

1.) All the Howling sequels: Howling II: … Your Sister Is a Werewolf, Howling III, Howling IV: The Original Nightmare, Howling V: The Rebirth, and Howling VI: The Freaks

Do I even need to say anything? No, but I will anyway. One of those is a bear, and the one with the cat is clearly Grandpa from The Munsters. What a long way to fall from the original.

 

Did I forget your worst looking werewolf? Include one that you thing belongs on the best list? Make your case in the comments.


Abigail Johnson manages the Tor.com Urban Fantasy Facebook and Twitter accounts and spends way too much time thinking about vampires, werewolves, zombies and all things paranormal in books, movies, TV and video games.

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